A Tale of Two Proms. Part I.

This week was a memorable one.

At least, not one I'd soon forget. For this week, yours truly attended two proms.

The first, on Tuesday, was Seri Cempaka Cheras' prom. It was a pretty amazing affair, that, and it added yet more color to my already colorful life. Pictures are all up on Facebook, in case you haven't noticed, so go check them out if you're interested, cos' I'm getting a tad tired of uploading all my photos to Blogger.

Here's a couple for your entertainment, though. Enjoy (:

With Ashley Almost :)

With Khoo Jun and Weng Kee, childhood friends of mine.

With the incredible Sheila :)

With Miss Yehbonne :)

Basically I got there by cab and idled a while with my man Khoo Jun until it started. Then I had a great time - I met some and interacted with some new people like the lovely Yehbonne and her friend Meenakshi. The performances were fun to watch and the dance floor segment kicked my ass. Literally. I ended up reaching home at 1 in the morning. End of story.

That was on Tuesday.

The next day was spent resting and cleaning up the apartment.

Count me in for the next one!

Alex out.

Unless the dreamer is the real you...

Feel a bit like the walking dead today.

With their mold-ridden rags and cloth. The stench of decay hanging about their bodies like a halo of putrefaction.

I'm putting together the final playlist for tomorrow's event. Believe me, kiddies, it's gonna be legendary.

You will soar and plummet simultaneously.

You will laugh hysterically even as you sob bitterly.

:D

Hyperbole.

Back to work!

Alex out.

Liftoff.

So, SPM is over.

Had myself a wee bit o' ticker tape parade and somesuch to celebrate the end of life as I once knew it. It was full of fuzzy little emotions, that. And what a refreshing sensation it gave me!

For you see, reader, Alex Leong was, until two days ago, a somewhat cantankerous and eager young lad trapped in a Byzantine school system who found it ... difficult... to conform to his setting. Study a year in a school like mine in a country like Malaysia and... you'll see my point soon enough.

Still, with clever manipulation of the time-space continuum (something Padawan would affectionately refer to as genjutsu), I have managed to emerge relatively unscathed from this crash of a flaming bucket of manure we call high school EDUCATION.

Which, by the way, is a very hilarious misnomer.

The way I see it, the only meaningful things I've learned in high school (through the work of our brilliant and beautiful educational officers) would be:

1. Being honest and sticking to MY values as an individual will only earn me the ire of others especially in authority, and will have me singled out as a troublemaker or somesuch who could only grow up to be 'prejudicial to public order'. Golly, isn't that moving up the ranks a little bit. And I've been reading the newspaper a bit too much lately.

Syed Hamid Albar *wink wink*

2. Nothing in life matters more than getting that one more A. And why? Because. Personal enjoyment and fulfillment are unimportant as they can come after you get a flashy degree, earn a million bajillion dollars and drive expensive cars. So the teachers and the parents are to invest time and energy and money to make us live the life THEY dreamed about and could only hope to achieve through US, the healthy, young, and ultimately impressionable people.

3. Hypocrisy = good. Pendidikan Moral, this is you. I've spent two years tolerating memorizing moral values "BULAT-BULAT" and God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha and the Hindu pantheon all know that I stick to nearly none of them. I'm an impulsive motherfucker who acts nice and cute only when it serves me best and I'll say and do fuck all if the mood strikes me. Like now.

4. Literature is my forte because it lets me answer in a very natural and candid way. Again, this is because I'm an epic demigod-like person who HAS an opinion and KNOWS how to express it without needing to be fed the answers. Seriously, readers, if the Ministry is so worried about the brain drain, Alex Leong can readily provide a remedy: Follow the Australian and American syllabus. And its execution. And have our teachers emulate their teachers.

Simple.

5. I want a PS3. Microsoft is cheesing me off and rubbing goat semen in my face with their shitty products and lack of customer support in Malaysia. Sony, my beloved yet estranged one-time fuck-buddy, is back in my good graces. Hence I shall purchase their console. How this relates to what I've learned in high school is very much a congruent point! School is another place where I get together with other gamers and discuss matters of the highest importance and relevance - gaming. I mean, what else does one need in life aside from food, sex and videogames?

6. Derb derber derber derb. Derb derb derber. I ran outta things to say. My mind is playing hula-hoops with rings of barbed metal.

I guess the only thing for it at this point is to forget everything I've learned over the past 11 years in school to make way for all the awesome I plan on cramming into it. A good way to wash it all out would be to go out and get that PS3 and embark on a gaming spree that's sure to promote more sociopathic behavior on my part.

Or, I could just read a proper book.

Either way, I don't quite know why I'm blogging cos' I'm tired like a buffalo-fucker on account of today being the first day of Leader Launch. You silly bitches love me for this shit so I guess I owed you a blog post even at the cost of my brain cells.

HUGS AND KISSES XOXO

And a wee bit o' tongue for the grown men and women, yes.

LIFTOFFFFFF!

Goodnight!

Alex out.

The Big One Cometh

We do what we do because we believe that we must.

And that, friends and readers, is my bullshit excuse for having not blogged for so long, updating with this extremely short post and not blogging for the next couple of months.

One simple reason. Sure, it's a bullshit and rather plain excuse for not updating, but then again I highly doubt my rantings will be sorely missed.

Mmhey.

As I was saying, SPM is around the corner and it's pretty much the biggest exam in my world so far. Bigger than trials, yes.

And I can tell you I've been studying a whole lot more than is actually healthy by my standards. No shitting around there. I've even stopped gaming so much. And I work out only twice or thrice per week now. A-friggin-mazing, huh?

"We do what we do because we believe that we must."

Storm clouds are gathering in my blue skies. There are examinations afoot. I'm off to the hunt.

So long, blog. So long, readers. So long, Twitter, Facebook and gaming.

It's been a slice.

And, I'm kidding about the last three.
Seriously, it's not funny.

Harhar :)

Ah, here's a picture of me before I go into hermit mode.

Until next time!

Alex out.

Feet First into Hell.

Ummmm, wokay. I noticed that I haven't been updating in a long while.

I've had a whole week of break to do stuff worthy of a blog post. And yes, my life is so incredibly dull that even the Tokyo Game Show '09 is big news for me.... or that could be more due to my love of gaming.

In any case, please disregard the statement about my life being dull. That's my id attempting to claw its way to the surface to topple my cantankerous ego. This is an official statement from the mouth of the font of awesome known as Alex:

"My life is so fucking brilliant and vivid that everywhere I turn I literally see tigers leaping through flaming hoops and hot scantily-clad women parading in front of me while fireworks jizz on the sky and paint it white. And that's during the intermissions."

Uh-um, my ego tends to get rather hyperactive, apparently.

I'd love to be long-winded and present you a big wall of text that is as eye-hurting as it is self-indulgent, but I guess I won't. Not today anyway. The text thing hurts me too.

All you need to know (or would bother to, eh eh) is that today I picked up a copy of Halo 3: ODST. I'd like to, I really want to, I absolutely HAVE to give it a spin, but unfortunately I'm fucked with a Bible Knowledge exam tomorrow.

D'ya have any idea how cocked up something as innocuous sounding as Bible Knowledge actually is? I, for one, imagined it to be something like this:

"Question 1: Who's the son of God? :D

Question 2: Jesus turned water into wine. True or false.

Question 3: Pontius Pilate's a bad son of a bitch. Discuss.

Question 4: Judas is an even badder son of a bitch. Elaborate."

And the list goes on.

Boy, how wrong could I be. I have to memorize not one, not two, but - oh wait it's just two - TWO books of the Bible. You motherfuckas can count, right? That's like one hundred pages of Jesus and his pals having their epic roadtrip across the Holy Land. And the print is tiny.

. . .

Holy shit Gina! That's a lotta words!

And I thought "Bible Knowledge must be easy." Psssshhh, what a load of goatse.

I'm outta here. Need to learn the entire syllabus for tomorrow. Or at least I can try.

Alex out.

Secks. And pens.

Bah, I haven't posted about the Merdeka Train Party yet!

I must remember to slack off during trials to blog about it.

Also to do: Buy a pen.

I don't have one. I need a pen for the trials. Y'know, to write with.

And a pencil to shade answers with. Possibly will use it to doodle more often than shade answers. Which will result in it being too blunt, short and useless to answer exam papers with.

... Better get two then.

I just finished drawing faces on the carton of eggs in the grocery bag. It's a obsession of mine. I seem to need to relate to my food items in an anthropomorphic sorta way.

Oh God, I hope I'm not turning into some kinda furry-fetishist.

"Now, off to KLCC to purchase a pen and two pencils."
Alex out.

Sweating over exams in my fruit suit

My heart is pulsing with the rhythm of a drum.

Make that two drums and a bongo.

Two drums and bongo, "played" by a trio of disillusioned Manhattan jazz bandmembers and an emo Peking Opera singer. Who've apparently been told to make as much bloody noise as they can.

It's always that way with me on the first day of the exams. Why do I react so when I know I don't quite care about the outcome? The answer probably lies within me, and all it takes to discover it is some pseudo-Buddhist ritual I suppose I should try when I'm in college.

For now however, I will be content to just revel in the sensation of facing the worst adversary I can suffer in this age. My youth and adolescence seems to be just hurtling past me before I can get a handle on it and own the bitch. Slow down champ, I'd like to have my life back for a while thank you very much.

Oh...

This fruit suit my sister told me to put on isn't exactly helping. The baby shirt and pants I wore when I was an infant can't really fit me any more yet my family still keeps them. Now why would they do that?

You know that you know what a fruit suit is cos' you had one at some point in your life.

I look at my munchkin-sized getup for a few minutes, pondering how fleeting life can be. My brain is blank. Then I notice the funny fruit patterns on 'em and my brain is filled with happy thoughts. I think, therefore I is.

I've been sick for the last few days. To counter this aberration of my physiological conjuration I'm currently listening to (and liking) the sound of Regina Spektor's voice. Her vocals cut through the fog in my head like a European pornstar's penis through hawt Brazilian . . . cocoa butter.

THREE CHEERS FOR RUSSIANPOLISHAMERICAN MUSIC!

And good night.

"Sleep is the fairer reaper I gladly welcome to assail me.
Plunge the dreaming blade deep, spectre that you are.
And let me dream of the golden fields of home."
-Alex L.

"Chemistry."
Alex out.